V-Day Rant

[V-Day is long past but I still am compelled get this rant off my chest. Enjoy!]

Why, for the love of all things red and/or chocolate-y, do kids have to celebrate Valentine's Day in school?

Valentine's Day is a holiday about romantic love. Period. I don't care how many cartoon characters are involved, this should be big-kid time. Right? Or am I missing something here? There is no sane reason to promote this romantic agenda to kids who still use crayons at school. Hell, they're already bombarded with mushy-kissy-goo-goo messages on TV and in the stores. Can't we please leave it at that?

Yeah, I hear you. Get a grip,you say, it's not that big of a deal. Just a chance to have a classroom party, score some candy, and all that.

I disagree. There are lots of other excuses to have a party at school. Celebrate the Equinox, for heaven's sake. At least that could tie in with a science lesson. Celebrate President's Day. It'd be great! Happy Birthday, dead presidents, happy birthday to yoo-oou! Just about anything would make more sense than celebrating Nod-nod-wink-wink-break-out-the-leopard-print-thong Day.

Go ahead, call me a crab, but I believe that even in our enlightened, hyper-inclusive no-child-left-behind society, there is particular brand of early childhood awareness and disappointment that happens in grade-school classrooms all across the county on Valentine's Day. Can't we try to not actively promote those kinds of insecurities, at least until their feet touch the floor at the kitchen table?

At least think about it, would ya? You gotta admit, thinking about romantic love in that context is just plain mommy-why-is-that-man-hanging-around-the-playground creepy.

[Thanks. I feel better not having to hold that in for another year.]