Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Indispensable Bag

RANDOM LIZ-NESS FOR 12.17.2008



This attractive and function bag is an absolutely indispensable tool for the Liz-on-the-go. It holds all of her shit, including her lunch (lettuce in the zip-top bag) and important paperwork (goldenrod-colored form that was due back at Young Son's school yesterday) as well as about three months worth of paid bill stubs in the capacious back pocket. It's also sturdy enough to hold about $27.00 in loose change, which allows it to double as an effective self-defense weapon as well as an easy way to build upper body strength.

Its hard-wearing black vinyl blends in with just about any decor, including the crap-filled second desk in her office, as shown here surrounded by an ever-handy roll of paper towels for those inevitable spills, a banana about to take root, and a 3.5" floppy disk*.

You may think that a bag this amazing would be out-of-reach of the average shopper, but you'd be oh, so very wrong. This treasure was purchased at the local W*Mart, and for less than $20.00 you can own one, too!

** WTF?!?
 

2 comments:

  1. I must thank you for the laughs -

    As soon as I started reading this I ran downstairs hoping to catch my daughter-in-law and daughter before they left to capture a picture of their bags.

    They too own bags just like yours - in fact I think my daughter has the next larger size.

    One day I needed a quarter - just one and they both starting emptying their bags to find me a quarter - I told them I would give them a dime for each quarter they found.

    Luckily they found the first one in seconds so that I could scrape that gross gray stuff off my lottery ticket.

    In the end it cost me over $30 but for some reason they would not let me 'keep' the quarters. I could not believe how much 300 quarters weighed. Over seven rolls worth.

    I also saw over 25 small candy bars in various states of squished, three or four paperbacks. no less then three digital cameras and my long lost digital video camera.

    Also found was my grandson's missing shoe and I am pretty sure a 'used' diaper (diapers are flat and folded not round and 'bulging' - right?).

    But in the shuffle my daughter lost her car keys. It was easier to have her take mine then 'look' for hers...ha ha.

    Great laughs here.

    Merry Christmas !! (or whatever is PC for you)

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  2. Damn. Is Jimmy Hoffa in that bag? I bet that mofo weighs about 75 lbs. You should start arm-wrestling professionally, Liz. I bet you'd win some money.

    Your bag looks like my wife's purse, aka "The Black Hole." Once things go in there, they are lost forever.

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